Victimized

I always act like the victim
Because I am the fucking victim
A victim of hatred
A victim of sin
When does the real sinning begin?
I hate myself
Especially my reflection
That causes your erection
That’s all I am
An erection

A constant imperfection

That shows no indiscretion 

Constantly losing my direction 

And tired of rejection 

And being up for subjection 

And suffering an infinite dissection

Then comes my objection 

Like a punch to my midsection 

I’m in need of some affection

And a little more protection

And in my future projections

I will find the right connection

His secret

I want to be your secret 

But a terrific one to tell

But if you’d just let me out sometimes

I know I’d fair you well
I do like our special secret 

But I just want to breathe

Fill up this little hole inside 

And feel the wind shake my leaves 
I love our little secret

But don’t you miss the world? 

We could still be alone our own way

I’ll always be you’re girl 
And I can keep a secret 

So please just set me free 

And when I have my freedom 

I promise you will see 

Bullet

I didn’t think you’d come back this time 

I thought I made it clear 

Without you I’m not fine 

But you’ll always dissappear 
I don’t know what I see in you 

I deserve so much better

And if you’d only stay away 

I could release this vision of together
But you’re just here to fuck with me

To make sure I lose my mind 

Leave me with all these maybes 

So I know I’ll never be “fine”
I can’t get away from you 

No matter how fast and far I run

Nothing I wouldn’t do for you

The bullet to your gun 

Haunted by the Living

I dreamed of you last night 

There just isn’t an escape 

Can’t get away whilst I’m sleeping

And haunted when I’m awake

I don’t want to dream of Shadows

Or feel this hollow pain

People have real problems 

Mine are in my brain 
Can’t handle this rejection

It eats at me everyday

My mind cannot escape him

It pulls me in separate ways 
Haunted by the living 

A tale we know to well

I’ve nothing left for giving 

And too much left to tell 

Again and again

And here I am alone again

Here comes that hole again

Forgot to play my role again

Got myself feeling low again

Drown the heart you stole again

Your love takes its toll again

When will I feel whole again?

Starting to lose my control again

Fighting to save my soul again 

As it goes spiraling down the bowl again

Time for you to quit the show again 

I’m getting hit with “no” again

Feel I’ve nowhere to go again 

Trails of Blue

What is my deal with you?

You’re really not that great

But my heart runs away with you

And I am left with the fate
Why can’t I get away from this ?

No matter how hard I try 

But the moment that you insist

Into the lake of fire I fly
How can you even go on?

Hurting people the way you do?

Living with the pain you spawn? 

Leaving a trail of blue 

One day….

So sick of saying one day

Why can’t that be now

I’m sick of this fake life I lead

I wish that I knew how
Why didn’t I just feel

And go with what I wanted

Instead of doing the right thing

And now my life feels stunted 
I hope there is a one day

I know I slighted myself 

And you took my.chance away

And put me back on the shelf

So Dark

So sick of sadness

Tired of searching for light

I’ll never find happiness

So why not give up the fight
I’ve burned all my bridges

And changed all the locks

Handled all my business

I answer as hell knocks
What are they to do to me

Better than what’s going on here

I’d rather burn for all to see

Than live with all this fear
I thought that I was loved

Brittle little lie I told myself

I can’t go on this way 

I feel I need some help

I Am Darkness

I am the darkness

I am that being that puts the chill in your bones

The breath on the back of your neck
I am the very definition of evil 

A succubus

Don’t tempt me 
Betrayal beckons 

No one ever came for me

As no one will come for you
I am the scream of terror in the night 

The shadow in the trees

The creaking in your home at night
I am your invisible enemy

Just watching 

Waiting for my opportunity to feed 
I am your worst nightmare 

The dark cloud hanging over your thoughts

The sounds of the night that instill fear

Deflowered

My little horror story
My sordid tale to tell
So if you’ll follow me
I’ll take you to my hell

When I was just a girl
The devil came to me
He showed me I was a woman
I could never get clean

Your Jesus never washed me
The blood was my reminder
No one ever came for me
The world was never unkinder

I never had a white horsed prince
Just a beast in ratty jeans
With no one to hold my hands
My wounds still left unclean

Every girl has a horror story
Her own sordid tale to tell
I’ve told you some of mine
A little piece of my hell