His secret 

I want to be your secret 

But a terrific one to tell

But if you’d just let me out sometimes

I know I’d fair you well
I do like our special secret 

But I just want to breathe

Fill up this little hole inside 

And feel the wind shake my leaves 
I love our little secret

But don’t you miss the world? 

We could still be alone our own way

I’ll always be you’re girl 
And I can keep a secret 

So please just set me free 

And when I have my freedom 

I promise you will see 

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Bullet

I didn’t think you’d come back this time 

I thought I made it clear 

Without you I’m not fine 

But you’ll always dissappear 
I don’t know what I see in you 

I deserve so much better

And if you’d only stay away 

I could release this vision of together
But you’re just here to fuck with me

To make sure I lose my mind 

Leave me with all these maybes 

So I know I’ll never be “fine”
I can’t get away from you 

No matter how fast and far I run

Nothing I wouldn’t do for you

The bullet to your gun 

Puppet Princess

Something to get excited about

I think he finally sees

Although I made some wrong turns

He can do as he please
I’m his little puppet

I designed myself as such

And he can only play with me

If he can keep in touch
I hope he sticks around this time

And we can have our own world

Where hours tick by in seconds

And we aren’t bound by fear
I’ll be his puppet princess

And he’ll make my dreams come true

And we will live on happily

Be glad it isn’t you

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White knuckles 

I need to occupy my mind
Find a way within myself
To find what it is i need to find

I need to hold on to this light
Dont turn back to darkness
Just grab and hold on tight

With the white knuckle grip you have inside
You have come so far
Just hold on to your pride

I feel my tenacity faltering
I dont know what to do
I feel my mind realtering

I cannot keep my strength
I feel the poison build back up
I try to keep it at length

I hope its all over soon
If i cant go on without you
I fear it spells my doom

I always end up right back at you

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All these moments that add up to life
They pick me apart and cut like a knife
And now I’m to be somebody’s wife

I want you but you’ve had your chance
All that was required was a little romance
But you just had to dance your little dance

Leaving me to walk around with this hole
Once filled with love for you that pierced  my “soul”
Once having you seemed my only goal

Then we made it even more complicated
As if that wasn’t already entirely overrated
And still inside my love never faded

And I don’t know what it is I want you to do
And I know how much pain we inflict with the truth
But all of the signs in my highway point back to you

Secret Beacon

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I was so lost for so long
And in walks you a shining beacon
Shedding light on all that was wrong
While i tried to stay in shadow

What is it that makes me love you
Im never jilted by your indifference
It has everything to do with you
I am not your only preference

Why do you hide from me
You know you want to talk
I promise not to steal you away
But we must walk this walk

If what i want is closure why cant i walk away
You dont even want me
But my feelings are here to stay
Though we are not meant to be

Nothing is written in stone they say
Yet my heart traiterously falls back to you
Youve already gone too far away
And theres nothing i can do

I anxiously await the day our paths cross
Because oh i know they will
And maybe i can feel something again
My dirty little thrill

No one but you

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Please come back to me

We’d barely just begun

The best is already over

And the worst is yet to come

You let me lie here bleeding tears

searching for my wrongdoings

whilst you walked away from me

as if you had no feelings

And while my heart still bleeds for you

I try to grow  fond for  another

I don’t know what else i could do

Because for me, there is no other

Monopoly

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You play me like I’m some game

As if I am the one that is to blame

And all it ends with for me is shame

Sadly though I’m still your dame

I still break my back in vain

knowing there will be only pain

you’re the only one who’ll gain

And I’ll be left in the cold wet rain

All it does is make me insane

Why can’t I get it through my brain

That you just don’t feel the same

And I will never have you tame

decrepit discrepancies

 Broken_by_nightshadevalentine

rotting from the inside out

wrought with insecurity and fear

I don’t know what it’s all about

And I don’t think you really care

I don’t know where to go from here

What to even say to you

where to put the feelings i once held so dear

What am i to do?

I don’t want to walk away

though my head knows it’s what’s right

my insides still decay

an endless internal fight